Scripture offers solid advice for those who want to have friends: be friendly! Most people desire to have others in their life that care about them and bring them joy. Friends certainly add color and laughter to our life’s journey. A true friend is a marvelous blessing and ought to be highly valued.
How do we find such people? Too often we are so concerned with how others are treating us, we do not take time to evaluate what kind of friend we have been to others. Do I bring joy to people by my presence? Are people happy to see me come, or relieved to see me go? Do people feel encouraged or discouraged by my words to them? Do people have more or less confidence after they have been with me? Do I leave a trail of laughter behind me or frustration and conflict?
If you are a miserable person, be grateful you have any friends at all. Friendship is a two-way relationship. We give as well as take. Take time to evaluate what your friends receive by being associated with you. Do they become better people? Are they drawn closer to God? Do they laugh more?
Take time to also reflect on the caliber of your friends. Great friends often attract great friends. King David attracted his “mighty men” while he was a fugitive in the wilderness. Jonathan loved David even if it meant losing his throne to him. There was something about David that drew people to him. What kind of people if any, are being drawn to you? Are they positive or negative people? Are they thoughtful or selfish? Critical or forgiving? If “like attracts like,” what do your friends indicate about the way you are conducting yourself?